Now, we had a past, so there were emotions involved. It was a beautiful thing. It was clear cut, with no mistake what this was and what it wasn't. I loved having my friend as my lover. But, it was not going to become anything more. I know that. He knows that.
Here's where it gets a bit fuzzy. He tells me it's ok to text him. Ok to tell him I love him. He wants to know what is going on in my life and for me to keep him informed about what is going on with me. But then, when I do these things, he gets angry with me. I don't understand.
Now, he's so angry with me, he may never even speak to me again. There are so many things I still want to say. But our separate relationships make that difficult.
Will he ever know that even though I love him, our friendship and platonic love is infinitely more important? Maybe he's secretly reading this and he will know my thoughts. Or, he has decided to cut me off completely and that decision is final.
I'm so very hopeful that all is not lost. We had such a beautiful thing. I hope and pray it's not gone forever. Talk to me soon. Let me know what you're thinking.